Instead of acting as though I have no autonomy in this matter, I should be owning my body image, my goals, my intentionality, and be honest about the fact that while it is at least partly as a result of messages I do not agree with but have internalized, this is a choice I am making. Nobody is perfect in their politics, but it’s more important to admit that than to pretend that I had no control in the matter.

(via boygirlboigrrrl)

I’ve been confronting these same issues. I’ve been trying to explore the (artificial?) boundaries between my dysphoria and my poor body image. What is the distinguishing characteristic that defines my transition from my other body-modifying actions?

I’m making final preparations (mostly economic) to start HRT. Also, I’ve been taking steps to lose weight and muscle mass (mostly long distance biking under caloric restriction). I eat well and my weight loss is controlled. I’ve gotten a lot of feedback from non-man friends of mine cautioning me to NOT lose weight and telling me how good I look, and generally responding how you do to someone with a problematic body image and potential disordered eating. It’s as if the people surrounding me are experiencing the same confusion about the distinction between trans body transformation and disordered body transformation. Interesting.

I come to the same conclusions as bgbg: regardless of the political implications, this is a choice that I’m making about my body, over which I am sovereign. I can have aspirational body politics without living up to them, and I’m not afraid of living out of sync with the opportunities my politics generates for others.

(Source: boygirlboigrrrl)